What Not to Do and What to Do
Let me define some terms.
Social means friendly companionship or relations, someone who enjoys
being with others, has to do with people. Twitter is a social group. Facebook
is a social group. Linkedin tends to be a formal social group. Its roots mean
Networking means "interact with other people to exchange information
and develop contacts, especially to further one's career"
I spotted a "friend" on Twitter. At least I thought his was a friend though I
know him only via his wife. We were fellow students.
So as a friend, I started to mention his name to help him expand and gain
He is a business man and promotes his service. His is an expert in his field.
However, as of this writing, he has a total of 24 followers.
No matter how well done his tweets are, he is not making much impact.
So I attempted to help in the spirit of Social Networking.
His Response to my Help: What NOT to Do
This message was sent to me via Linkedin:
“Please. It's impolite to jump into someone's conversation where you're
not invited, even in a social media setting. I have very specific uses for
Twitter. They are professional, not personal, so when you add my
twitter handle to your tweets you're a) a distraction, and b) subverting
the whole reason why there's a "follow" button.
“Sorry to be a little distempered over this, but with my current workload
I can't afford distractions on my comm lines.”
On the same day, this was tweeted to me:
@Poet_Carl_Watts PLEASE STOP ADDING ME TO YOUR TWEETS.
I didn't ask you to, and it's even worse if people favorite
or retweet them.
Both his communications stated I was wrong. He even noted his was
“distempered”. I also have no idea what "subverting reason why there's a
follow button" means! Anyone have any guesses?
Notice the all CAPS! That is shouting at someone in writing. He knows this
I question why he put his “distemper” in written shouting communications to
I apologize for being a distraction. I see my effort were in error. I humbly
I didn't make him wrong for being rude. I didn't attack back.
Even as he thanked me, he further made me wrong!
I simply ceased to follow him on Twitter, Linkedin and Facebook. I no longer
consider him a friend.
His statements were hostile insults!
A Possible Correct Reaction.
Hi Carl, thanks for the shoutouts. However, I'm working a specific plan
of action and wish to grow my Twitter account according to my plan.
Can you not include me?
I would have replied:
Oops or Sorry, I understand. No more shoutouts. Let me know if I can
assist you! #EverythinWill_B_OK! #AwesomeTeam♥#Odycy☮:-)
A social network should fit the definitions of 'social' and 'network' as given
Rude remarks, insulting, mocking activity should not happen. It isn't like
someone is standing in front of you and you have to react.
Here, you have to pay attention, read their tweets and then type up a
response. The only people that have to be rude are the trolls, shills and the
If you feel the urge to attack someone because of their words or actions on a
social network, I'd like to suggest you first ask yourself two
Assuming you're sane enough to pause for even a moment, ask yourself if
what has been said will make any difference in a hundred years, ten years,
or even tomorrow?
Has what's been said harmed or harming you, your family or friends right
After those two questions, I suggest you write out your response, set it aside
and come back in a few hours and read what you wrote. Do you want to
send that for everyone on Twitter to read?
What kind of effect do you want to create? Realize your written response will
impact many potential readers. It will certainly impact what they think about
By the way, this applies all interpersonal relationships and to all sides in the
political games on Earth. We do share the same planet!
If you feel you would like some gentle assistance with this, contact me. I can
Let me know if there's a subject you need to know more about, a question you'd like
expanded on or anything you'd like to see me write an article about. Happy to do so as
I'm always looking for new ideas. Contact me via this site by going
"Listen and Guide, Someone to."
©2014 Carl Watts www.carlwattsartist.com 010615