Control may have a negative meaning to many people. Why would this be?
Let me ask you a question, who would you like best to control you, your mom
or your dad? Or perhaps someone else?
Parents often totally mess up in their efforts to control their children.
What parents get is revolt instead of cooperation.
Children are people, short but still people!
Just because someone is short or very young doesn't mean they can't do
If they can't you probably have already messed them up.
Let them wash the dishes. You can redo after they are asleep. They need to
learn by doing, not by being told.
You can show them but let them figure it out.
How to Control People, Seek Cooperation
For simplicity, I'm going put control in two divisions that may be used in
The sane method is to consult them, give them information so that they agree
to play games with you to increase your survival and their! It's easy to do.
Actually, you really don't want to control others. Controlling others is far too
difficult when you can have their support and cooperation!
See related article How to Get Cooperation.
How to Control People, Seek Domination?
Here, if you are in real bad shape yourself, you seek to cut them down. You
try to make nothing of them so they are powerless, ill. Then you can tell them
what to do, right?
Specifically related article: Who Has the Right to Insult You?
You do this because you are in fear or you are covert hostility, basically
If you are in a little better shape, you use out right threats. You promise to
harm them in some way. You hit them or lock them up.
You do this because you are angry or antagonistic. Better than fear/covert
hostility but still insane!
Police are in this band. If you don't cooperate, they will beat the "you know
what" out of you and then jail you.
So what if you did no wrong, you failed to cooperate. In many countries, they
might just shoot you.
That is using force to dominate.
Related article: People Who Want You to Fail
How do Dominated People React?
If you don't kill them off right out, they may appear to cooperate. This
appearance is until you turn away. Then they seek revenge.
People may react differently, some may become apathetic. Many reactions
are possible but none are good.
The prison systems that jails people, takes away their freedom, doesn't work.
It seems we don't have a better solution, but do we?
Criminals went insane at least during the moments of their crimes.
When you punish a child, they get you back is subtle ways, muddy foot prints,
breaking your favorite whatnot, etc.
Punishment, the use of force, doesn't work. It creates fear and hostility for
you. It can potentially ruin a child or adult whom it is applied to. Look around!
What causes insanity?
I'll give a couple reasons. Lack of self respect allows criminals to commit
crimes. More basic than that is lack of space.
Space has collapsed in on these poor beings.
Further taking away space by caging them merely makes them more insane.
Prisons and mental institutions both employ this method which makes them
If we have to imprison them, it should be on a huge, very huge island. Let
them have SPACE!
If we don't have an island, pick a spot in the desert. Let them have lots of
space. Let them go out and camp far away.
Let them come back when they need food and water. They would become
sane fast or perish.
There is also a program that has been remarkably successful with inmates:
Criminon. Check it out!
What Results Do You Want?
Do you want revolt, to create a potential criminal?
Or do you want cooperation?
You will get the result based on how you handle people.
How Were You Handled?
Most often people handle/control people the way they were
handled/controlled. Look back.
Are you being your mom or dad and forcing thing?
Or are you being sweet Aunt Bessy who could cut you down so fast you
wouldn't even know you were bleeding?
Knock it off. Be yourself. If you find that difficult, let me know. I may be able to
quickly guide you to being you!
Related Article Children and Time Outs.
Do you have suggestions for a “How To” article? Let me know :-)
Listen and Guide, Someone to.
©2012 by Carl Watts/CarlWattsArtist.com 022313 edited 050414